Infidelity and Abuse
I came across this news article on 4 October 2012 from ABC News about a knife fight caused by accusations of marital infidelity. It triggered a memory of a fairly recent article in PsychCentral.com about a correlation between accusations of marital infidelity and domestic abuse. (Coincidentally, October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month in the US.)
This subject is incredibly difficult and emotive, and I wanted to stress to anyone who might find themselves in these circumstances, to do everything that they can to ensure their personal safety.
Before confronting your spouse or partner about concerns of infidelity, consider if you should have someone you trust nearby just in case, particularly if you or your spouse/partner have a tendency towards violent behavior. Consider perhaps choosing a venue where you could obtain help if you needed it. Plan what you are going to say, how, and where, and try to remain calm. If you sense any hint of the situation escalating into physical violence, carefully disengage and remove yourself from the situation. The issues will still be there tomorrow, or the day after, or next week, when you can both perhaps sit down again in a calmer state, perhaps in a more public place, and tackle the issue again.
Infidelity Amplifies Emotions
Be aware of your partner’s behaviors, particularly during this time of heightened emotional stress and take the necessary steps to protect yourself (and your children) from any physical fallout.
Most infidelity situations, thankfully, don’t take this nasty turn but some do. Be conscious of the dangers and take steps to do what you can to minimize the risks. You should be clear that infidelity can bring out the worst of any of us, so don’t rely on previous good behavior as an assurance that your situation won’t mushroom into a violent confrontation.
For the US: National Domestic Violence Hotline
For the UK: National Domestic Violence Helpline
We have a number of other contact numbers listed on our website, but please don’t hesitate to call your national emergency number (e.g. 911/999/112) if you need help and protection.